I have been reflecting on life recently and remember a job my husband and I shared as estate managers for people living on independent retirement living complexes. We met many interesting people and lived in some great places. We looked after the properties and gardens and kept a friendly eye on all the residents, making sure that they were up and about, not needing anything and contacting the right people to help if required.
We found that a lot of people just needed to have someone to talk to. This was something I loved doing; with a cup of coffee at my side I could spend hours keeping them company, listening to their stories. They were always so interesting, with many of them involved in the Second World War in some way. A lot of their families were busy with their own lives and although they didn’t forget their loved ones, time was something they were short of.
Through work I have visited many wonderful places in the British Isles. I have some lovely memories and hope to keep making more. But so many people these days spend time looking at places through their phones instead of living the experience. It’s good to have one or two snapshots to help remind us of a good time, but I’d ask everyone to just take a moment, look up from their devices and soak in their surroundings, chat to people and commit this time to memory whether they’re at a concert, by the sea or simply enjoying a day out with a friend. There’s so much you miss while you’re trying to find the best angle for a photo, although thankfully gone are the days when we waited for the film to be developed only to find a thumb across the lens!
My health has deteriorated so I do not get out as often as I would like and rely on memories to keep me cheerful. I have a wonderful husband who takes care of me and is supported by a very good medical team. I have learnt patience, leaving him to do things in his own time. He is not me and does things differently.
I am fortunate to have more family living nearby who pop in to see me. Recently, my niece and her husband visited with their young daughter and twin boys. They also brought my sister and nephew’s wife, and my youngest also called in with her tribe so it was a real houseful, but oh-so-lovely to be together. These times we spend together are very precious and will never be forgotten. One of the twins picked a wildflower and gave it to me “because I was nice” – something so simple but goes to create another wonderful moment in life.
Our lives are made up of memories. Let’s make sure that we live life to the full, do things together and spend time listening and sharing. On a cold winter evening we’ll then have more than just photos to reflect on.
By Hazel Clayton